SHOULD YOU RUN OR STAY?!
Birge-Bytes: Did you know that the symptoms of "being in LOVE" are almost identical to Anxiety Disorder?! One of my most important lessons I taught was Healthy/Unhealthy Relationships. Thinking that you can "change" the abusive person AFTER MARRIAGE is simply not true...it almost always gets WORSE AFTER MARRIAGE....Mrs.B.
("Love is blind, tho, can be very true!")
TEN WARNING SIGNS TO RUN
CONTROLLING: Questions you intensely...WHO you talk to....WHERE you were...WHY you are late? wants you to ask "permission" to do things.
EXTREME JEALOUSY: Calls or visits unexpectedly...checks your car mileage...hates your job "cause you might meet someone there!"
ISOLATION: Tries to distance yourself from other family & friends;
if people "support" you they are called "trouble-makers"...may even deprive you of a phone, car or job!
VERBAL ABUSE: Belittles, insults, degrades,curses,calls you cruel names...might even WAKE YOU UP from sleep to do so!!
BLAME: It is ALWAYS someone else's FAULT if they screw up.
SUDDEN MOOD SWINGS: very short fuse....sweet to violent in minutes. easily insulted...rants about injustices of things that are just part of life for everyone....anger when drinking!
FRIENDS TRY TO WARN YOU!: They might even ADMIT to past abusive relationships but will always say the OTHER person MADE them act that way. If you have GOOD, LONG-TERM friends and they WARN you....PLEASE LISTEN.
"PLAYFUL" USE OF FORCE: Holding you down when you say NO.
CRUELTY TO ANIMALS OR CHILDREN! Expects children or pets to do things far beyond their ability to do so...punishes or kills pets.
THREATS!! May say "I'll KILL you"....followed by "everybody talks like that" excuse later. "YOU MAKE ME ANGRY" Instead of "I AM ANGRY"
A good, Healthy Relationship Has:
(1) Compromise on problems; a fair balance. Love is NOT 50-50 all the time...sometimes it needs to be 70-30 or 80-20 etc. You are a TEAM; you share your strengths.
(2) Never be sick AT THE SAME TIME! Ha.(this is FREE advice)
(3) Discover things about the other person that ADDS to your love and admiration of them over the years.
(4) NEVER taking the other person FOR GRANTED...you COULD actually lose them at anytime! (I thank God everyday for every day I have with Jerry)
(5) "LIKE"...AS WELL AS LOVE THEM...big difference here, folks.
(6) If you "fell in love" with that person....WHY DO YOU WANT TO CHANGE THAT PERSON?! Some people have a tendency to "fix" things that are not broken! (especially women)
In later posts I will cover how to spot a person lying....
"SHARING A HISTORY WITH ANOTHER PERSON IS THE GIFT YOU RECEIVE FOR THE WORK REQUIRED IN A HEALTHY MARRIAGE."
MRS.B.
"TO BELITTLE IS TO BE LITTLE!"
("Love is blind, tho, can be very true!")
TEN WARNING SIGNS TO RUN
CONTROLLING: Questions you intensely...WHO you talk to....WHERE you were...WHY you are late? wants you to ask "permission" to do things.
EXTREME JEALOUSY: Calls or visits unexpectedly...checks your car mileage...hates your job "cause you might meet someone there!"
ISOLATION: Tries to distance yourself from other family & friends;
if people "support" you they are called "trouble-makers"...may even deprive you of a phone, car or job!
VERBAL ABUSE: Belittles, insults, degrades,curses,calls you cruel names...might even WAKE YOU UP from sleep to do so!!
BLAME: It is ALWAYS someone else's FAULT if they screw up.
SUDDEN MOOD SWINGS: very short fuse....sweet to violent in minutes. easily insulted...rants about injustices of things that are just part of life for everyone....anger when drinking!
FRIENDS TRY TO WARN YOU!: They might even ADMIT to past abusive relationships but will always say the OTHER person MADE them act that way. If you have GOOD, LONG-TERM friends and they WARN you....PLEASE LISTEN.
"PLAYFUL" USE OF FORCE: Holding you down when you say NO.
CRUELTY TO ANIMALS OR CHILDREN! Expects children or pets to do things far beyond their ability to do so...punishes or kills pets.
THREATS!! May say "I'll KILL you"....followed by "everybody talks like that" excuse later. "YOU MAKE ME ANGRY" Instead of "I AM ANGRY"
A good, Healthy Relationship Has:
(1) Compromise on problems; a fair balance. Love is NOT 50-50 all the time...sometimes it needs to be 70-30 or 80-20 etc. You are a TEAM; you share your strengths.
(2) Never be sick AT THE SAME TIME! Ha.(this is FREE advice)
(3) Discover things about the other person that ADDS to your love and admiration of them over the years.
(4) NEVER taking the other person FOR GRANTED...you COULD actually lose them at anytime! (I thank God everyday for every day I have with Jerry)
(5) "LIKE"...AS WELL AS LOVE THEM...big difference here, folks.
(6) If you "fell in love" with that person....WHY DO YOU WANT TO CHANGE THAT PERSON?! Some people have a tendency to "fix" things that are not broken! (especially women)
In later posts I will cover how to spot a person lying....
"SHARING A HISTORY WITH ANOTHER PERSON IS THE GIFT YOU RECEIVE FOR THE WORK REQUIRED IN A HEALTHY MARRIAGE."
MRS.B.
"TO BELITTLE IS TO BE LITTLE!"
