CAN LOVE LAST?
Birge-Bytes: "God gave us memories so that we might have roses in December."
James M.Barrie, Scottish Novelist
Looking at the quote above I might add that He gave us roses to make up for the
"thorns" in life! "Old age is not for sissies", Betty Davis once said and neither is MARRIAGE.
At my age "checks" are the only things I've got that bounce! I've learned how to prevent sagging, tho....I just eat until the wrinkles fill out....o.k. enough self-deprecating humor.
I want to tell you the WONDERFUL side of loving one man your whole life! (If it is the SECOND man because the FIRST was an asshole... it also counts. :)
(1) You get to experience a "History" of being with someone thru all the changes
life gives...all the adaptations needed....the loving "compromises"... of which will draw you
closer or tear you apart. EACH trial you experience together will only make you stronger
for the next one...and there WILL be a next one, trust me.
I don't really like speaking for other people so these are MY perceptions and realizations
about My OWN marriage...the painful lessons learned and the incredible joys shared with
someone i love dearly.
(2)CAN LOVE LAST? YES!! .....NOT Infatuation, not Lust, not Game Playing....you
need to be "OTHER-FOCUSED" on making that person happy....you have to RESPECT them and love them as they are...they are NOT "A FIXER" to be changed by you.
then add a big dose of Humor to soothe the edges as needed! Whether your wedding was as simple as ours was fifty years ago in our Chapel filled with candles (couldn't afford flowers OR a Reception afterwards) or as lavish as a "Kardasian circus" ...these 3 elements
above are the foundation to build your life together. The Infatuations and game playing is better left to High Schoolers. Today, we have what I call "Serial Monogamy" ...the ceremony is a new "party theme" to show off what you can afford and who
you can get! I was a "Trophy Wife" but only because my love won so MANY trophies
in Baseball and I had to polish them:)
(3) If we had kept up the "intensity" of our attraction for each other we'd still
be fogging up our '57 chevy windows....love gradually becomes deeper and deeply meaningful. Over the years I have never stopped loving my husband...
I may have "disliked" him once or twice but that is a different post coming up:)
I often wondered over the years how come two so very different personalities
survived so many things together and finally realized that while being opposite
personalities we were ONE on the really important lasting values.
".......and they said it wouldn't last!!
James M.Barrie, Scottish Novelist
Looking at the quote above I might add that He gave us roses to make up for the
"thorns" in life! "Old age is not for sissies", Betty Davis once said and neither is MARRIAGE.
At my age "checks" are the only things I've got that bounce! I've learned how to prevent sagging, tho....I just eat until the wrinkles fill out....o.k. enough self-deprecating humor.
I want to tell you the WONDERFUL side of loving one man your whole life! (If it is the SECOND man because the FIRST was an asshole... it also counts. :)
(1) You get to experience a "History" of being with someone thru all the changes
life gives...all the adaptations needed....the loving "compromises"... of which will draw you
closer or tear you apart. EACH trial you experience together will only make you stronger
for the next one...and there WILL be a next one, trust me.
I don't really like speaking for other people so these are MY perceptions and realizations
about My OWN marriage...the painful lessons learned and the incredible joys shared with
someone i love dearly.
(2)CAN LOVE LAST? YES!! .....NOT Infatuation, not Lust, not Game Playing....you
need to be "OTHER-FOCUSED" on making that person happy....you have to RESPECT them and love them as they are...they are NOT "A FIXER" to be changed by you.
then add a big dose of Humor to soothe the edges as needed! Whether your wedding was as simple as ours was fifty years ago in our Chapel filled with candles (couldn't afford flowers OR a Reception afterwards) or as lavish as a "Kardasian circus" ...these 3 elements
above are the foundation to build your life together. The Infatuations and game playing is better left to High Schoolers. Today, we have what I call "Serial Monogamy" ...the ceremony is a new "party theme" to show off what you can afford and who
you can get! I was a "Trophy Wife" but only because my love won so MANY trophies
in Baseball and I had to polish them:)
(3) If we had kept up the "intensity" of our attraction for each other we'd still
be fogging up our '57 chevy windows....love gradually becomes deeper and deeply meaningful. Over the years I have never stopped loving my husband...
I may have "disliked" him once or twice but that is a different post coming up:)
I often wondered over the years how come two so very different personalities
survived so many things together and finally realized that while being opposite
personalities we were ONE on the really important lasting values.
".......and they said it wouldn't last!!
